Have you ever thought about how people perceive you? I mean seriously thought about it? It’s true that we all wonder what people think of us every now and then. But it’s also true that we tend to wonder this through curiosity rather than for any constructive reason.
Getting to the bottom of how you come across to people is key to being assertive, influential and confident at work. Once you know this, you can start to think about adapting your behaviour so that other peoples’ perception of you is what you want it to be. So to feel confident and to get people to listen to you, you need to know how you look and sound; you need to know how you come across.
But some peoples’ reaction to this is …. "Who cares what people think of me!" – These sound like the words of a confident person and to an extent the person is right to think like that. It’s true that confident people don’t worry as much as others might about what people think of them and how they come across. It’s fine to think like this and be independent minded but it’s dangerous to discount other peoples’ perceptions of you completely.
People who disregard others’ perceptions of them are missing a trick. It really does matter what people think and how they perceive you – but it shouldn’t be the be all and end all. The reality of life is that most people can’t help but be affected by other peoples’ impressions of them and therefore how people react to them. This in fact is a positive thing if considered constructively. The important point to remember is that if you can control others’ perceptions of you, you can control how they react to you.
Consider also that the way other people perceive you may be very different to your self -perception. In fact, it’s often the case that your self-perception can differ quite radically to the perception others have of you. In some cases it’s quite striking because a person’s self-perception is that they lack confidence but the perception of others is that they are confident. So, these peoples’ self-esteem can sometimes be low for absolutely no reason!
If you really want to find out how others perceive you … go to http://www.think-confidence.com and complete the Reality Check – this is a free multiple choice questionnaire that others complete on you anonymously – you’ll have no doubt about whether your self-perception is the same as others’ perception of you once they’ve completed the Reality Check.
Good Luck!
Mike
