It’s Saint Valentine’s Day so a blog about love seemed almost obligatory.
There are various theories on the origins of Valentine’s Day, but the most popular goes back to the time of the Roman Empire when in 270AD the emperor Claudius II didn’t want soldiers to marry because he believed single men made better warriors. Bishop Valentine went against his orders and performed secret marriage ceremonies. When Claudius found out Valentine was first jailed and then executed for his disobedience. Prior to his execution of February 14th he wrote a love note to the jailor’s daughter, signing it "From your Valentine". Awwww.
It’s now a well established tradition of course to express your love for someone special on this day. And it’s big business. It’s celebrated in numerous countries around the world, from the US to Italy, Canada to Denmark, Mexico to France and the UK to Australia. Around 150 million cards and gifts will be given in the US today! And over £500m will be spent in the UK.
The love theme has also been used by businesses who have used Valentine’s day to exhort their people to "love your customer". But really – is that likely? Is the relationship employees have with their customers ever strong enough? Love is a feeling that is deep, profound, passionate, having a strong impact and influence on us, so is it realistic to ask employees to manufacture those feelings towards customers? I don’t think so.
On the other hand perhaps the problem is the meaning we attach to the word. What if we made it mean something slightly different? What if, for example we adopt the various meanings that the ancient Greeks had for love?
They described four types of love: agápe, éros, philia and storgé.
- Agápe described unconditional love, a general affection for someone else, a sense of holding them in high regard. It was described by some as benevolent love and Christians used it to describe the love that God has for people.
- Éros was love in the sense of being in love with someone. It was passionate love with sensual desire and longing (although not necessarily sexual in nature). Plato suggested that: "Although éros is initially felt for a person, with contemplation it becomes an appreciation of the beauty within that person, or even becomes appreciation of beauty itself."
- Philia is the love that exists between friends. It requires virtue, equality and familiarity. It’s the love that leads to a bond between people who share the enjoyment of common interests and activities.
- Storgé is natural affection, an enduring fondness like that felt between family members or sometimes perhaps between others who find themselves together and develop affection which lasts over time.