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Cecilia Felice

Match.com

Clinical Psychologist

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Blog: Working your business skills on the dating scene

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Many of our finely tuned business skills can be applied to the dating scene. Match.com’s resident clinical psychologist, Dr Cecilia d’Felice, shares her advice on how you can transfer your business expertise to your dating toolkit:

Research
You wouldn’t turn up to a business meeting unprepared and the same diligence should apply to a date. Think about some conversation topics in advance in case there’s a quiet spell, or even brush up on their interests – that said, don’t come armed with a script, you want to keep it natural.
If you’re arranging the date, try to find a location where you will feel comfortable – you’re more likely to make a good impression if you’re relaxed in your surroundings.
 
Self-promotion
Skilled professionals will use different sides of their personality to handle different situations. However, when it comes to dating, the best way to promote your own image is to be yourself. If your self-image has integrity, others will be aware of this and respond positively.
 
Dressing the part
Choose an outfit that is appropriate for the date. If you can, aim to reflect an aspect of your personality too – a piece of statement jewellery, really good accessories and clean skin and hair are sure fire ways of expressing that you feel good about yourself and that you have a fun side.
 
Networking
Every person you meet has come to you for a reason. They may not be the love of your life, but their best friend just might be. Ruling in friendship rather than ruling it out will increase your social network and widen your dating opportunities.
 
Online dating makes it incredibly easy to broaden your social circle and set up dates with like-minded people. If we do not risk we do not gain, so if you feel shy about networking remember that so does everyone else and that you have nothing to lose by saying ‘Yes’ to new contacts, just as you would do in business. 
 
Negotiation
Your business negotiation skills can easily be applied to dating. Remember to keep your preferred outcome in the back of your mind, but be flexible in your approach. For example, if you’re deciding on the venue for your next date, but you’re not keen on any of their suggestions, try and “negotiate” a mutually acceptable alternative.
 
Stay focused, but don’t become too transfixed on the final result – this way you won’t put off your date by being too business like.
 
 
Cecilia d’Felice is resident clinical psychologist at match-making website, Match.com.
 
We welcome any and all contributions from the community, so please feel free to share your views and opinions with us, your colleagues and peers via our blogs section.

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Cecilia Felice

Clinical Psychologist

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