Love bombing is a phrase commonly associated with dating that describes when a person excessively praises or flatters another person before suddenly changing their behaviour.
While it may not look the same in the workplace, love bombing within a professional setting may better be defined as ”praise bombing”.
Here, we explore how leaders can spot the signs of love bombing in the workplace and tackle the issue to avoid it happening in the future.
Where does love bombing happen in a professional setting?
Love bombing between managers and new employees is a common scenario in the workplace.
A leader may have the good intention of making a new recruit or staff member feel welcome. But this can slip into love bombing (or praise bombing) when a leader goes overboard with flattery, especially when it’s served in front of other team members, to the point where it becomes uncomfortable.
New employees subjected to this may feel pressured to meet high expectations, which can lead to stress and worry. Of course, there is nothing wrong with managers setting a standard of excellence within a company. But it can detrimentally impact both the employee and the rest of the team if unrealistic expectations are set, making them feel like their best isn’t good enough.
Spotting the signs of love bombing
If, as an employer, you are concerned that your staff members are engaging in love-bombing behaviour, there are a few key things to look out for:
Managers overly praise their staff with no constructive feedback
One obvious sign of love bombing is when managers only give their team members glowing feedback with nothing to work on – as if everything they do is perfect. While it’s important to tell team members how well they are doing at work, providing constructive feedback is key to helping employees progress. Over-the-top praise with nothing to work on could signal love bombing.
Dissatisfied team members are given too much attention
Another red flag is when an employee who raises concerns or dissatisfaction is suddenly given overwhelming attention. Managers may do this because they sense the employee is losing interest in the role and will move on. In this instance, the manager may over-compensate with reassurance in the hope that this prevents this unhappy employee from leaving.
New hires are promoted quickly to secure their loyalty
You may notice managers wanting to offer a quick promotion (or more rewards) for their new hires to secure their commitment to the company. Length of service doesn’t necessarily indicate how qualified someone is for a promotion. But if there is a clear imbalance between rewarding new and longer-term employees then it could be a sign of love bombing.
A working relationship between colleagues suddenly becomes sour
A clear sign of love bombing in the workplace is when a previously strong relationship between employees quickly deteriorates. This decline often occurs when an employee fails to meet the unrealistic expectations set by the other party.
What can leaders do about love bombing?
- Ensure employees establish clear boundaries between colleagues: Define what is (and is not) acceptable behaviour through standards and a code of conduct, and share guidance on how to discourage behaviour that may blur lines.
- Promote open communication: Create safe spaces where employees feel comfortable reporting concerning or manipulative behaviour.
- Lead by example: Ensure you model professionalism and respectful behaviour as a leader, so other employees observe and follow suit.
- Monitor team dynamics: Keep a close eye on relationships and dynamics between team members, particularly if you think some team members are receiving excessive attention.
- Encourage accountability: Make sure employees hold themselves accountable for their own actions, ensuring manipulative behaviours like love bombing have consequences.
